Top Ten Ways Mayor Kevin Johnson Will Ensure that Lance Armstsrong's Bike Won't Get Stolen

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10.  Constant surveillance.

9.  Alert Police Department's senior canine.

8.  Use newest police technology.

7.  Give Lance a "Sactown Special" bike lock.

6.  Use a sophisticated GPS tracking system.

5.  Assign IT engineeers to monitor bike at all times.

4.  Monitor eBay 24/7.

3.  Ready-To-Go replacement bike from city fleet.

2.  Put a famous detective on case.

1.  If bike disappears, pay Chief Braziel's relocation cost to Seattle.

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